The 9 D&D Alignments of Buddhist Traditions

If I hear even one god damn nerd joke because I'm an old D&D player, I swear to God, I'll delete this blog and start writing a blog all about smegma. I'm serious! OK, so what? I used to play D&D as a kid, and still enjoy some alone time with my collection of 6, 8, 12 and 20 sided dice. No big deal! Anyway, so one of the most important aspects when creating a character in the old Dungeons and Dragons game was to choose an alignment. The character's alignment was important as to how the character was supposed to act during certain events or situations in the game. Example: Say my Troll Necromancer was Chaotic Evil, I wouldn't be donating a portion of my dungeon crawl proceeds to help a handicapped children's hospital, but rather I should be raiding their hospital beds to feast upon their tender young flesh and steal their balloons.

I felt like an alignment of the major Buddhist traditions was in order, given the fuck ton of D&D nerds that decided to drop everything and become Buddhist over the past 10 years. (I can't get away from you motherfuckers, can I?) Funny thing though is they still aren't getting laid, at least without a webcam or craigslist. So, without further ado, one of my more tasteless posts, where the word fuck is used one too many times; The D&D Alignments of 9 Buddhist Traditions. The first pic, which you can click on to see the full size turd, is the classic grid style, and beneath that, for you lazy fuckers, is each offensive tile in all its stupid glory. And no, the chick on the motorcycle in the first tile is not real. Her head was severed long before she was mounted to his bike. Way to go Pure Land!

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(Click for the full size picture)

Good

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Neutral

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Evil

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Well that was a shitty post. To redeem myself, I give you Bruno Mars, The Lazy Song: